8 years ago, I went shopping for what I hoped would one day be my dream horse. I had a lot of goals back then. I really thought I’d be doing the big shows, the big jumps, and living my best life.
Well, turns out it’s a bit hard to predict where life goes. A lot of things changed based on my own choices. I chose to have kids. I guess I just thought it would be easier. Spoiler: it wasn’t easy. They take a lot of time. I don’t even remember much of the twin’s baby years because I was so tired.
And then things just change in life. Situations don’t play out how you expected.
It came to a point in my life where my stress levels were through the roof trying to make time for everyone and everything. I was just stretched too thin. Something had to go, and that something was Stu.
My trainer sold him for me. My level of involvement was actually very low. They put a lot of training on him, and it’s actually a bit sad that I didn’t even get to ride him after he had the training. He was doing full courses with lead changes. I missed out on the actual fun part.
Selling him was sad, of course. It felt like the end of my horse dreams. It felt like the end of my riding journey. I don’t have a riding horse anymore. Berry has been gone for years, and Vintage died a year ago. I have the two ponies still, but I hardly have time for them. Plus they are pretty small, I don’t think I could realistic ride them on a regular basis. Which I can’t, because I don’t have time. I’m hoping one day I’ll have the kids riding them… maybe.
But I’m also just tired in general. I used to love having my own farm, with the horses on the property. But now it just seems overwhelming. It’s too much, and I’m just so tired. 2025 was a pretty terrible year for me.
In regards to horses, I don’t know what the future holds. I know eventually I’ll be riding again, but who knows when that will be. I hope to still be involved in horses in some way, but I just can’t commit to anything at this point. I actually thought about shutting down this blog, closing the book, so to speak, but I’ll give it a little time. If I go a full year and have nothing to say, that could be the end.
But, I am still a bit of a dreamer and/or schemer, so I do have another venture going on. It has literally nothing to do with horses, so might not interest many horse lovers, but I’ll share it just in case.
I started a new business, selling hats. It’s called Proper Icon. I’ve always loved hats, but the hat selection America is so boring so I decided it was time to jazz it up. If you like hats, you should check it out. If you don’t, well, maybe you should learn to love hats!
But, that’s where I’ll be focusing my public time now. So if for some reason you get the thought, I wonder what that woman is up to now... that’s where you’ll find me. Probably a bit more restrained and proper though, I’m trying to run a business here! (and hopefully that business will lead me right back to horses.)
I’m a little bit proud of myself, so this is my debut collection:
Check them out if you are so inclined.
Overall, it’s been a fun journey with everyone I’ve met through this blog… I’ve greatly enjoyed watching you progress with your horses. I really loved seeing women living their best lives with their horses, sharing the quirks, the humor, and the victories, large and small. One day I’ll be back with you, the horsewomen.